Untitled…

The things you feed me are not necessarily what I like..
But since I’m hungry, I can't help but take a bite.
Thirsty for more than what this watered down love is..
I need something more. A little pop. A little fizz..
Jaded by the thought of holding you.. Having u
But now my hearts cold, I dream of grabbing you.. Stabbing you..
Not with a knife but these words poke holes..
So swift, so deadly.. These words pierce souls.
See when I said yes, that meant NO to the lies. No to the heartache. No more asking why's.
Its break ups to make ups.. No to the cries. There u go leaving. No more of your goodbyes.
Tired of the fussing. Tired of the screaming..
Tired of when shit gets tough, you end up leaving.
What do we do? Do we try to get along?
Lethal words back & forth. Yea we're both living wrong..
Fuck up after fuck up, I'm tired of chasing u.
I need to cut my loss, I'd be better off replacing u.
Sometimes I feel like we just together with no purpose...
Relationship faded. This shit is just so hopeless..
Problem & solution.. I think I got a bit smarter.
But when I take a closer look, this whole thing gets harder.
So many lonely nights coming, a dark road ahead
It’ll take time to get used to being alone in this bed.
Would it be much easier to say fuck it, just give up hope?
I thought if I lost you I'd die, but I been cut that rope..
Got down from the chair, there will be no kickin..
Gotta get back on my grind, I know time is ticking..
Can't waste another second, nor minute, nor hour..
I think I got a fresh breath from this sweet love turned sour.

Christmas Dreamin’

WTF kinda dream is this and why the freak did I remember the whole thing?? Like to hear it… here it go….

I was out taking pictures ALL day & it looked like I was in like 5 diff cities or countries bc I never saw half the shit in NY FL or anywhere else I've been. So I was out & was walking I guess home & it suddenly got dark. Like pitch black dark. & I couldn't see anything. So I went in the street and started running. All of a sudden I bumped into a group of guys & they we're getting ready to fight a guy so I guess they got mad at me for messing up the beginning of the fight & the dude took off running.
The lights started coming back on. They had guns & started pullin em out so I took off too.. But me & the guy they was looking for were dressed alike. I hid under a truck & then it was fully lit outside. So when he passed the truck he got dwn on the floor & pulled out the gun. So I started screaming & saying I'm a girl not the guy. So I crawled out & had my hands up & he took me back 2somebodies house. They had me sitting on the couch & the only mean one was the head nigga.
The homies or whoever they were was trying to find a way for him to let me go. I was begging & pleading & trying to explain that I didn't know buddy & I was just on my way home from some photo shoots.
He wasn't really listening that much & they just told me dnt say nothing 4a while. So I just sat there btwn 2big niggas & it was a dude sittin on the floor kinda near my legs. So when I looked at him it was the nigga they were chasing. They said a few words & then one of the shot him on top of his head. His body sat up 4 a good while then he slumped over. THEN a lady came downstairs & was giving everyone bazooka & BIG candy. Come to find out it was the guy that got 
shots mom but she didn't notice he was dead.
Then the boss went to the kitchen & they told me I need 2talk 2him str8 up & be confident but not cocky & try 2get him to let me go.
He didn't come back 4a while & I noticed he had a big ass walk in closet. It was shoes everywhere placed SUPER neat. So for whatever reason the brought me into the closet. & wanted to show me some new sneakers that he had & was the 1st one with. 
I must’ve touched the shoe & it came down. Then I put it back the wrong way so they fixed it so he wouldn't notice. Then the guys disappeared & 2girls were there & started talking to me about shoes. They sat in the closet while I was on a couch outside the closet.
They asked how many I had & I said like 10.. & they looked disgusted. So I'm telling them I used 2have shoes lined around my closet & room but gave them away & I don't really get 2wear them anyway cuz I wear my work shoes & flip flops the most.
So they had some big ass hair tie that looked like pants & I heard her say come help me tie her. But I thought she wanted me to help wrap the other girls hair. So I'm like how? & they both looked at me & laughed. Then they got up & started comin out the closet with it & then I woke up.

FIN.. THE END.

Shit Crazy!!!

Thousand Ones Remix DZ ft. C-Ride

I’ll keep this short and sweet…
Make sure yall download Thousand ones Remix.
Great collabo.
SNAPPIN HOEEAAAHHH!!!
#VNeckGang Affiliated
& Follow them on Twitter… comedy & music.
DZ THE RAPPER                   C Ride Hoeaaahhh!!
Thousand Ones Remix DZ The Rapper ft. C-Ride

Oh yea… Check out @MissLexyDiva dancing to Thousand Ones.. U Already Know!!

Sexy Lexyyyy!!!

Tis’ The Season…

As Christmas approaches, I can’t help but to think of my blessings. Of course I’m not as hyped up about Christmas like when I was a kid but it does bring back a lot of memories. And eff it… who doesn’t love presents?? As we know, many are unable to celebrate with gifts etc etc because they can’t afford it. I respect people who put their priorities in order. That’s the adult thing to do.

More often than not, we take the small luxuries we have for granted. When I had a car… I used to put major miles on it. I was paying for it so sh*t… Why not?? Now that I don’t have one at the moment.. Its hard but I don’t NEED a vehicle to survive. Its just a matter of convenience. As long as I can get to work and back, I really don’t care. People complain about how hot somebodies house is but think about the winter months and people who will damn near freeze to death because there is no heat.

I think about things like this on a regular but what REALLY made me was the fact that I sat in Miami Subs today after work and picked at my crispy chicken platter. After about 20mins, I ended up throwing away most of the chicken. As soon as I walked outside, I realized there was the homeless man that’s always on 6th ave & 167th. I’m sure he would have loved the food. No to mention its like 40 degrees outside. I felt like absolute crap. So… instead of saying “Next time” I called him over and asked if he had dinner. He said no so I took him in Miami subs for something to eat. When I came back, the staff was asking if I forgot something or needed something else. I just said no & gave the guy the meal ticket. As I walked out the door, one of the cooks stopped me and said “Thank you, I don’t know of ANY young person who has or will do something like that. You have a good heart.” We spoke for a few minutes and I was on my way down 6th.

The moral of the story is what good is it having money or life’s luxuries if you are selfish? I’m not rich by far but I do have a job and $5 is not going to break my pockets.

Happy Holidays to all.

-Chan

Mp3 Invasion…

Ok so before I came back to FL… I had a few things in the works. I had LOTS of free time on my hands etc etc so I was presented with an opportunity that was pretty good. I got kinda sidetracked and fell off a little bit but today makes my 1st OFFICIAL post with MP3 Invasion. Woot Woot!! DJ Dirt Dawg is a good dude and I support his projects completely. And – being that I agreed to this so long ago, I gotta keep my face clean. =)

Make sure yall check out:

 MP3 Invasion

DJ Dirt Dawg

Street Connect DJs

& Then... My Heart Stopped

When I saw you, I KNEW I had to have you. Not in that sexual way but more like a friendly way. You know the kind where you can't stop singing "This could be something. Or maybe its just nothing at all....at all"??
Something you did caught my eye & I can't lie... I Loved It! Nothing Big. Just something about it was cool. Never mind who you are to THEM. I want to know you for myself... In my own special way. So - I wait. Patiently waiting to make a move. Usually I play the background. Low key. Observe. No need to be the center of attention.
Most of the time, when I see something I like, I won't say anything. Its not that I'm shy.. I just don't want to ruin my fantasy by you saying something stupid. LOL. But THIS was different. I'll take that chance.

No pressure.

No relationship talk.

Just enjoying each others company. Just good, wholesome fun.

Shortly after... We Met.

And Then... My Heart Stopped.

((Ps... This is old... & NOT about anyone specific. Just random thoughts. So with that being said... Don't try to guess or assume. Thanks in advance))

Hate To See You Smile

Its sad when people who you thought were on your team are secretly against you. Of course everyone wont agree with your actions and choices but who are they to talk shit in the first place? What have you done in life that makes you an expert or even worthy of commenting in such a way? THIS is why I live for ME. THIS is why I don’t talk to a lot of people on certain levels. People wonder why I’m distant. Wonder why I stay to myself a lot of the time. Wonder why we never have anything to talk about. Some people are only happy for you when their own lives are going the way they want it to. That’s messed up. If you’re going to be down for me.. it should be done regardless of how sucky your life is at the moment. If you wasn’t so busy being a Negative Nelly, you might’ve been able to feed off of my drive, success and life lessons.

Positive + Positive = Positive. Simple math.

The moral of the story is:

I need LOYALTY on my team. Don’t Be A Hater, Hooeeaahhh!!